KarensJourney

Trent and I are sorry to share that we have lost the baby. It appears in the end that I carried the pregnancy to 9w6d and the fetus died in utero at 6w3d. Today the fetal pole was no longer there and has disolved into a mass cluster of cells. The uterus is starting to shrink. The doctor felt that my body should miscarry the pregnancy this week on its own. I go back next monday at 4pm to check on everything. If it has not been taken care of I will take the medication next Monday to labor it out. I refused the D&C option. Thank you for all your love and care during this trying time in our family. We hope to someday get to know this soul that was a small part of our lives.

Well friends, its been a tough week for me. I have decided to share in because I need the support.

As you know I got a positive pregnancy tests Dec 23rd. Based on my LMP I should have been 8w6d going into my ultra sound on Monday. The fetus is there but only measuring at 6w3d. There was no heartbeat that could be detected. As you can imagine this has brought concern to all of us. He said there are two possiblities. ONE…we can’t go by my LMP because maybe I ovulated way later than I normally would have, making me not as far along. OR The fetus died and stopped growing at 6w3d and my body has not registered the miscarriage. They call it a missed miscarriage or missed abortion. He told me to wait a week and go back Next monday. Fetus should be bigger showing 7w3d and we should have a heartbeat. If that is the case than we go by ultra sound for the Estimated Due date. If it is not bigger and no heartbeat we will know that it terminated itself. It is nothing I did wrong, my body levels are good. If the fetus died off it was natures way of taking care of a bad pregnancy, or a pregnancy with abnormalities he said. Either way this has brought a scare to us as you can imagine. I felt so blessed to have the first one. I was looking forward to finishing our family. If there is no change the doctor wants to schedule a D&C to abort. I am struggling with this, but know that it is necessary if that is the outcome. I have prayed a lot. I cannot say that i have been inspired in any direction. What i do know is that I want to wait two more weeks and make 100% sure that there are no errors. I could not live with myself if I jumped to quick and made a bad decision terminating a life.

I am sad, hurt and confused. I decided to share because I think any prayers would be helpful. I will keep you posted.

Happy new year and Anniversary to me! LOL I wonder how well the new year is gonna go when the first thing I ate in 2009 is a chocolate covered pretzel. I hope everyone was safe, made good choices and is ready for a killer year!!!

It was such a wonderful time at our home. How about you? The baby got his first skateboard..LOL now he just needs to learn how to crawl on his own. They boys were thrilled with there model cast cars, my daughter is rocking out as Hannah Montana and the baby loved the fact he could make his little dog make tons of noise. Oh joy!! We snapped a few holiday pictures after church while everyone still looked their best. We tried to get one of all of us…but that just did not happen this time. The holidays go so fast. It feels like we prepare for months and it is over in a few hours.

This new year of 2009 is gonna be a great one. One full of first and memories. I look forward to the goals I have for myself. Everyone makes new years resolutions and  seems to give them up within a month. I am happy to say that I failed a few of mine from 2008, but I also finished some and that makes me feel super good. So for the new year….these are things I want to work on.

1. Keep current on the scrapbooks for all the kids. So far so good.

2. Keep a more positive attitude and outlook.

3. Have a healthy   ncy….LOL

4. I want to stay more active this time and avoid bedrest. That means 30 min walk or elliptical. Can easily be done.

5. Be a more patient mom.

I am sure there are a million more things I can add. But these are my main focus. I want to wish all of you a healthy New Years. Please be safe and make wise choices. See ya next year!!

Merry Christmas to me I guess! I know what my buddies are thinking..How old is her baby now? He is 7 months and will be 15 when the new one comes. So the real question is…how good of friends are my buddies? Are they willing to stand by and support through another 9 month pregnancy? LOL..I sure hope so. I just love ya guys to pieces. This time I am going to stay very healthy and keep my exercise up so that I can combat bed rest again. Man I hated the 4 months of bed rest last time. It will be harder to do since I have 4 other kids. =0) Estimated due date is mid August if all goes well.

I hope you are all having a wonderful Holiday. I treasure you and wish you the best. Happy New Year.